Friday, December 19, 2008

Life as a single mom

So I haven't posted in quite some time, but I have a very good reason. I finally had my baby! He is a week old today and I'm definitely realizing how tough it is to be a single parent. The father is involved, he actually comes to see him every day and while he is here I usually take the opportunity to get in a nap or get things done around the house. If any of you know me personally, you know that I'm not a very patient person at all.. which scared me because I thought I'd get frustrated easily with taking care of a newborn by myself, but surprisingly I have all the patience in the world for my little man. It's the most surreal feeling having him home with me and knowing that he is mine.. and he's perfect. I know I probably just think that because he is my baby, but he really is perfect to me. And even though we aren't together, I'm thankful to have the father involved in our baby's life. It's amazing to see them together.. father and son. He'll play with him, feed him and everything, but change diapers lol, but he has really come around. And even if he doesn't care about me.. I'm glad he cares about his baby as much as he does.

Being a single parent is definitely the hardest job I've ever taken on.. but I wouldn't change it for the world! He has my heart. <3

Baby Aaden Michael Forward
Born December 12, 2008
7 pounds 6.5 ounces 19.5 inches long

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Finally a date!!

There is finally light at the end of the long, long tunnel. I went to the doctor today knowing it was my last appointment.. and they set my induction date! I gotta be at the hospital at 7pm on Sunday night to be induced. So I will be in labor all night long and probably most of Monday since according to the doctor, this could be a long process lol.. and as my child has proven, he's stubborn and wants to stay in the womb until the warm weather comes back. But we won't allow that.

Now there's a date set.. it's all finally setting in that I'm going to have this baby within 5 days! Here come the crazy emotions and I'm glad no one has to put up with me for the next 5 days unless they want to haha. I've been told to get as much sleep as I can on Sunday before I go in.. but we all know that's not going to happen. I will be way too anxious to sleep on the day I get induced knowing I'm going to be holding my baby within 24 hours.. hopefully!

Yayy!! Baby Aaden.. born Monday, December 15th, 2008.. <3>
{unless he doesn't come out until Tuesday.. but we're shooting for Monday lol}

Friday, December 5, 2008

Where are you baby?

Today is December 5th.. my due date, but my baby is comfortably laying in my womb still.. content as can be. I'm convinced he'll be in there forever.. or at least until it warms up outside because he doesn't want to come out into this cold world. As frustrating as it is to have your due date come and go.. in a way, I'm kind of relieved. I'm in denial about going into labor lol I could probably be having the worst contractions ever and still have a smile on my face and say "no, I'm just having fake labor pains" haha. I'm terrified and nervous, but I want it over with. I want to see my baby and hold him in my arms. I want to hear him cry for the first time.. which will probably make me cry. It's crazy.. this whole time I wanted this pregnancy over. I've had pains and pressure to the point where I couldn't stand it anymore, but now that it's down to the wire.. I'm afraid for it to be over. Not that I don't think I can be a good parent and handle taking care of my baby, but it's just going to be weird not being pregnant anymore. Nobody wants to admit that they can't handle it on their own, but I will admit that going through pregnancy alone was tough and I know raising a child on my own is going to be a challenge at times too. I have friends and family that support me and are there to help when needed, but I like to know I can stand on my own two feet and still have the patience to care for my baby. I'm stubborn.. just like my little man has proven to be...

So as you can see.. I'm full of many mixed emotions about going into labor and having this pregnancy be over, but overall I know it's going to be worth it once I get to see my baby Aaden. <3